These are some of the things that ive really settled into since becoming a mom. These things are some of my core values as a homeschool mama and wife. I hope by reading you find yourself nodding at some of the points in acknowledgement that you aren’t alone! I also know that there are so many ways to be a good mom and you know what is best for your family! Im simply sharing a bit of my motherhood.
Becoming their mom makes everything else seem so unimportant. You don’t really care what anyone thinks. You don’t care if you own family thinks you’re nuts. I’ve become more ME. Like a truer me. It’s broken me open. It’s softened me in so many ways. But is also unleashed something more dangerous that I hope never has to be used. Motherhood amplifies all your senses and DEEPENS all your feelings and thoughts. It’s expanded me in every way. I think it feels really hard when we don’t allow it to change us. We cannot stay the same. We can not move through the world the same as before having kids. Unless of course you have people to replace you. Then you can move more similarly to before. They are the one thing I’ve never handed over. I’ve always been the one to be there. It’s exactly as I want it. Am I tired, yes. Are some days excruciating, yes. I am absolutely the a luckiest woman ever, yes. I am where I want to be.
- “bedsharing” and “cosleeping” is just “sleeping” in almost every other part of the world. It’s the western world that has it all backwards making moms think they are ruining their kids by sleeping with them at night. Sleep training was not created with baby development or attachment in mind. It was created by men to convince mothers this was needed, because society pressured to get women into the workforce. That meant they needed to sleep.
- Your husband should support your decision of where the baby sleeps…yeah I said it
- Your husband should not be a crusty vanilla troll and blame intimacy issues on a baby. The bedroom/bed is not the only place to practice making babies. I am fully convinced that if a baby sleeping in your bed “ruined” your marriage…it was definitely already it deep trouble.
- There is no easy way to birth a human…period.
- 4 years old is the world average weaning age. The AVERAGE…not the longest amount of time. So yes, my breastfed baby will have teeth. Get over it Pam…bite me.
- My body is soft and looks like this because ive grown and birthed 3 whole humans. They are my favorite. I’ll never wish for my body that wasn’t a mother. I. Am. Not. Her.
- You owe it to the people that count on you to stay healthy and strong. My skin is stretched, one boob is 3x the size of the other, I have fat on my stomach…but I MOVE MY BODY. I lift weights, I do pilates, I train juijitsu, I research all the time to try to do better, I eat to nourish myself. I’m not perfect but l intend on being AROUND FOR A FUCKING LONG TIME on purpose, and to be USEFUL. AND I CAN FOR DAMN SURE CARRY ALL MY CHILDREN OUT OF A SITUATION.
- I don’t think I have anything all figured out. I don’t think anyone does. That’s what makes life beautiful and interesting. I am so grateful for the mom friends that I can ask deep questions to. They make motherhood really doable. These aren’t just “playdate” friends or my kids friends moms. These are MY FRIENDS. Sharing deep wounds, worlds questions, literally taking care of each others kids and just showing up to support each other.
- My husband also deserves a hot wife. Im here for the marriage glow up. My husband would want to bang if I fell into a trashcan. I haven’t found the thing that turns him off lol but still, all about the marriage glow up. As much as I can. But dudeeee. Some days it’s the same sweatsuit for 48 hours. Thank God he is super into me.
- I already miss them. The moms who know what this means…you get it. I already know that these are the best days of my life. Where we all live under one roof. Where they are basically extensions of me and me them. I ache for more time. I wish they could all be younger together. I also love seeing my older care for my Youngers. I love hearing Remi run to the door when dada gets home. And her learning how to say words and we are freak out when she makes a noise to mimic us and it sounds nothing like the words but we all start clapping. I already miss us like this. I miss rereading the heartwood hotel, one chapter per night to all the girls as we lay down for the night. I miss them asking questions about the universe and god and how it all started. I miss them saying how they can’t wait to be moms and that their husband will be bigger than daddy (good luck with that one) I miss them asking to paint and go to coffee shops together. I hope that part never ends. I hope we do that until I die.
- Fortune favors the mother. I am rich! and so are you
Where are you with these? Any similarities?
Love you guys, mean it!
-Jesse